YoU weRe mY evErYtHinG...NoT anYmoRe

2007年2月14日星期三 --

okie, i submitted my jae form

yar... for my jae form... after stoning for darn long and thinking for hell long... i decided not to even give vjc a try. imagine...

if i put vjc 1st choice. i don't get in, i'll be darn happy coz i noe i din give up my dream.is vjc dun want me. but den if i get in...i will be so darn at a loss... coz i wana go tjc... (i tink mostly is because he is there) den nid 2 appeal and all that... so troublesome

so might as well put tjc 1st. i put vjc 2nd btw. coz i felt tt i had 2 include in sum how. haha~ but it's quite lame lah, coz if i can't get in2 tjc *TOUCH WOOD* i won't be able to get into vjc...

anyway, so yar... i'll 90% be going tjc alr. unless u're telling me 4 pts oso cant get in...=.=

doubt it...

i heard tjc got no flexible combination. but wenfeng says that u can choose very weird combinations. indirectly suan-ing me that i'm taking weird combis lah! *pouts* HAIX

i duno..i'm afraid i haf 2 take subjects i don't like...

=(

tt's the most saddening thing. just like A maths. although somehow it turned out to be a B3... (i suspect something seriously went wrong) but yar... it is a B...& all who know me will know how much i 'LOVE' A maths... i love it so much that i can cry while doing A maths sums.

HAIX...

duno how...

but since i'll like, definitely end up in tjc... no point brooding over the fact that vjc's uniform is so much nicer. no offence XD

but u gota admit lah, it's true!!!

anyway, i realise tt the people in yjc r really nice lah... shall be so sad to leave.. but I will adapt 1!! XD

haha~

trying 2 cheer myself up here...

anyway yesterday was so tiring. i pon-ed school. went to this temple to pray for a divination lot. and got 'coped' $10... SAD... *heart aches for my money* haix.. anyway, i was asking if i should go to tjc and whether me and him will have an ending. and yar... it as a good lot. shang shang qian~~ =)

so yar... i dun tink it's really 100% true lah. but it sort of made me feel a teeny weeny bit better. although when i went home i still didn't noe how. & i had gone to his hostel after that.. i didn't noe tt duman high is under going renovation so no school already, on the day i went. no wonder nobody stopped me when i went in. but e hostel is not moving. & i must say, e hostel really looks quite nice ^^ haha~

then i asked him in sms if i could leave the thing with the guard and ask her/him to pass to him. u noe... he said sumthing lyk "what do u mean? if u want to give me a present, forget it. there aren't any festivals." I was really sad lorh... i think he was deliberately trying to forget lah... anyway i bought liquor chocolates for him. $20. *heart ache*

but i went anyway. took mrt to aljunied, take 158 bus. yar... den i found out tt there's a guard house at e back. so i went out and walked all the way to the back. carrying my heavy bag and walking under e hot sun. so i went to the guard house. and the guard asked me to call him. I had the feeling tt if i called him, i'd just yar... get a good dressing down. and then we will quarrel again. =.= HAIX so i just sms him n told him when he's free later, he can go down to the guard house to take. i waited some time for his reply. den i realised tt he wasn't gona reply. i thought he was angry with me. because i was a bit stubborn. he clearly said no need to give and yet i still went. then the guard finally accepted the fact that he knows the gift is here and let me leave it there. =.=

so i left feeling really dejected and seriously doubting if i ought to put tjc...at all...then i reached home and while i was sleeping, he smsed me saying he got it already and thanked me for the chocolates. i was so happy that he wasn't angry with me. then i apologised for not listening to him coz i was already reaching when he told me not to give.then he said, no lah, thank you. you're always giving me stuff and it makes me feel very bad.then i came out with a lie that i bought 10 of the same thing for my friends. o.O

so fake lah. i think he would know that it's not true... but he didn't say much. so i just took it that he doesn't really wana care too much. o.O well... but after that i felt that we have really... drifted apart.

so maybe going to the same jc will shorten the gap? i sure hope so lah... but it's like... only a short 7 months... =( i don't know, seriously...

but am i expecting too much? haix...我要的只是一个机会。。只是尝试让我陪着他。或许我的要求太多了。偏偏我喜欢的是他这么一个冰山

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